Poison Kiss
by cafeNowhere
Summary: A series of one shots in which the Varia can't seem to learn that idols are not people that one should mess with. Featuring Quartet Night and STARISH :)
1. Never

**Alright, so as promised here is my sequel of sorts to Fanboy Antics! This time I'm writing Varia and Quartet Night, so I really hope I got the characters right and that people will find this at least some what amusing.**

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Reiji Kotobuki was very confused. He was currently lying on the sidewalk wrapped up in wires in what had been a quiet neighborhood only minutes before. Today was his day off in a busy schedule of practices as Quartet Night had been preparing for a big comeback tour. Now he was heading back to the dorms once again where Ittoki and Tokiya would be waiting. However, his trip had been rudely interrupted when he was suddenly surrounded by a bunch of very strange men. The four of them had seemingly appeared out of nowhere. Wires had appeared from the cloak of one member who had ensnared him while the others looked on, the few light posts in the area leaving their faces in shadow. However, now that he was on the ground with his white fedora lying beside him, the man with long white hair suddenly began shouting at the others, disturbing the silent street.

"VOIIIII I told you morons to tag the guy with white hair, not a white hat!" shouted an irate man with long, white hair.

"Shishishi, the Prince follows orders from no one," replied a young man. He had blond bangs shadowing his eyes and a crown adorning his head to match his self-proclaimed title.

"Senpai, you hit the wrong target, you baka." Deadpanned the boy next to him. He was wearing a frog hat and seemed to show little emotions. This earned him a knife in the leg, at which he didn't even flinch.

"Next knife goes into your face, stupid kouhai." Bel replied with a smirk.

"Awwww, but this one is so much cuter than the original target! Can I just take this one for myself? Pleeaase?" Whined a very eccentric man with bright green hair who was wearing sun glasses though the sun was already down.

"Do you even have a brain, you trash? You can explain to the boss why we got the completely wrong person then, I don't feel like being target practice for him!" replied the swordsman, though they soon found their argument cut off by their prey who had been left on the sidewalk besides them.

"Ummm hey, why am I tied up again? My little kouhais will worry if I don't get back soon!" Reiji said with a pout. If there was one thing he had learned from his years living with his band members, it was the art of the perfect pouting face to break through their otherwise emotionless facades.

"The Prince commands silence from his prisoners, unless they want to play with his knives," at this Reiji was silent for a moment, before his face lit up with a mischievous smile.

"Ohhhh I get it, Ai-Ai set you guys up to this, didn't he? He's still upset that I forgot the sprinkles on his rainbow birthday cake, I knew it." Reiji said in disappointment, shaking his head, "though I didn't know he would be this upset about it, I guess I'm going to have step it up to a five tier cake next year instead of three."

"Fran thinks you're stupid," commented said frog hatted teen, still standing carelessly with a knife lodged in his leg, which he began to play with.

"Yeah, you're right, I should have made the backdrops myself for the dance numbers, what was I thinking?" replied Reiji, a disappointed frown marring his features.

"Ooohh, I want to see, you know Luss loves watching them idols sing and dance!"

"Well, I don't think it will be as good by myself though…"

"VOOIIII idiots, have you forgotten that boss is expecting us back in an hour with that marshmallow bastard- VOIIII don't attack me!" Squalo shouted as he suddenly found a cluster of knives zooming towards his face.

"Shishishi, but you voice was hurting the Prince's ears." The knives which had been heading towards the now absent Squalo instead found themselves embedded firmly in Fran's hat, which began to droop.

"Oww that hurt baka." stated Fran, who had been contemplating throwing the first knife off of a nearby bridge, and thus had not dodged.

"Well you should have avoided them you useless frog," Bel sneered, snatching his knife back from Fran's hands, as Squalo attacked the storm-flame user from behind.

Meanwhile Reiji had found the wires wrapped around him had slipped due to the Prince's distraction, leaving him free to move, though he didn't get far before he was snagged by Lussaria.

"Now sugar, let's hear that voice of yours!" the man squealed, beginning to fangirl in anticipation.

Reiji shook out his arms and cleared his throat, before starting into his song, singing over the background noise of the violent fighting commencing behind him between the other three. By the time he had hit the chorus, Squalo could be seen frozen mid-swing with Bel standing nearby, wires drooping to the pavement and knives gripped loosely in hand, with Fran standing stationary as before, knives still implanted in his hat. As he hit the last note, he had the assassins openly stunned, and had even managed to knock Fran's hat off. Taking a bow he casually strolled off, passing by a white-haired figure leaning against the wall hidden behind the corner with eyes closed and a broad smile on his face, bag of marshmallows forgotten on the pavement besides him.


	2. Innocent Wind

**A/N: Yay, second part done! Hope you like it, and I should have the next part of this mini series next week! Don't worry, the other members of both groups will get their turn soon.**

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Now if there was one thing that Bel could always rely on, it was the disgustingly and consistently annoying lack of emotion from his kouhai. He had tried nearly every form of attack known to man and still continued to get nothing but sass. While Bel could hardly stand any of the peasants he was forced to associate with, this one was especially irksome, for the simple fact that his reactions were almost… not human. So Bel coped by throwing knives and throwing insults, knowing that once he could eliminate Fran, he would finally have peace. That is, until he had met _that_ thing…

It was a pleasant afternoon. The sun was shining, the birds were singing, and a light breeze was lazily pushing the puffy white clouds across the sky. Of course, none of these things had mattered to the Varia as they never bothered to take time off from their constant bickering. As usual, no Varia fight could ever be truly complete without weapons. So while most people in the park were playing soccer or Frisbee, this group was playing their own version of tag in which the person to get the least injured wins and gets to decide which way the group was going to go next. It was all good fun until…

_Thunk._

"Ow. It seems I have been impaled."

At this the battle royale promptly ceased as Lussaria, Squalo, Bel, and Fran stopped and looked at the source of the voice in disbelief. They had never heard a statement so blunt and emotionless from anyone, not even Fran. The injured teen had a smaller build and had his medium length teal hair tied back in a short pony tail. He had a casual, but fashion forward sweater on, which seemed to be odd considering the hot summer weather. Though he had a knife stuck firmly in his bicep, he was standing calmly looking at the knife with mild curiosity as blood was slowly soaking into his sleeve. With his odd tone of voice and appearance, each of the Varia members couldn't help but compare him to a certain frog-hatted member in their midst. Bel was the first to snap out of the stupor as his face broke into an evil grin.

"Shishishi, you never told me you had a brother, froggie! Another peasant to submit to the Prince!"

"I am confused, you do not appear to be royalty?" Ai stated, head tilting slightly to the side in the process.

"Voiii, why didn't you tell us there was another of you!" Squalo shouted, brandishing the sword still in his hand in Fran's face.

"That's because there's not, baka, he's just a wannabe poser." Fran replied in his usual monotone voice, looking bored with the situation.

"I am not doing any posing though, how am I a poser?" Ai asked, still with only the slight head tilt to show any emotion.

"Awww sugar, I wanna see you posing, Fran doesn't do it enough for me." Lussaria whined with his big puppy dog eyes shining through his sun glasses.

"I can pose, but there is no point, it is my day off. Perhaps you should ask Reiji instead." Ai said with a shrug and just a slightly mischievous gleam in his eyes.

"Oooohhh, who's this Reiji? Is he Fran's brother too?" Lussaria cooed in excitement.

"They're not my brothers you disgusting senpai. Besides, what's the point of posing for a camera when a puny bean pole won't even even show up in the pictures?" Fran said as he eyed the teal-haired teen.

"Do you want to see how?" Ai's eyes were gleaming with a subtle, unnatural passion as he began to dance, striking pose after pose. Lussaria nearly fainted out of sheer bliss and Squalo looked mildly impressed, while Fran looked like he had been slapped in the face. Bel for once in his life had a look of sheer horror on his face, akin to that of his own victims. Not only did this teenager have the monotone sass of Fran, but he could _dance_. Bel had hardly begun considering the many terrible uses that this dancing could be put to when his hands started trembling in fear. He almost didn't notice when Ai finished, brushed off his sleeves and began stalking off. _Almost_.

"Hey p-peasant, give me b-back my knife, you th-theif!" Bel shakily spat out before the idol could get out of range.

Ai turned around casually and looked down at his arm. He lazily drew the knife out of his arm and dropped it to the ground before he again began walking away in pursuit of his own kouhais, who had begun their trip to the store as a casual walk, but had turned into a chase as Syo escaped.

For a brief second the group was frozen, before a small chuckle escaped from Squalo. He had just begun to process what had just happened and soon his small chuckle began to grow, bursting out in a loud roar of laughter. "You idiot… hahaha… you both just got shown up… hahaha… by a teenager! That was great! Hahaha…" Squalo stuttered out as he was nearly bent over in laughter, tears springing up in the corner of his eyes. He was soon down on the ground and gasping for breath. Meanwhile Fran was alternately smirking at Bel and frowning after the teal haired teen and Lussaria was gushing to himself over the dancing he had just witnessed. Needless to say, it didn't take long for Bel's knives to start flying as a battle royale broke out once again. However, even considering the extremely violent nature of the Varia's fights, no injury came anywhere close to that of Bel's pride when he began a stash of Ai's merchandise that evening.


	3. Only One

**A/N: For those of you who happen to like this collection, I gift you with another chapter! Yay :) ****And thanks for the reviews Horsemuon17, they make my day!**

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Kurosaki was in heaven. He had found a nice clearing all to himself and his bass guitar, with nothing but the sound of the rustling wind and his own music. He finally had some alone time with his baby, which didn't happen often living in the dorms with all the other idols, and especially with Reiji. As much as he loved his fans and his bandmates, he had yet to meet any person who could take the number one spot in his heart away from his bass. Needless to say, he did not appreciate having his quality time interrupted, which was what seemed to be happening at the moment.

"I _told_ you that I saw a guy with spiky white hair come this way, now hurry up, I don't want to disappoint boss!"

"You idiot, that guy doesn't have white hair, it's gray, and he has a guitar. You are going to have to pay me extra for this wasted time."

Kurosaki slowly stopped playing as he heard voices and began looking for the source among the surrounding trees. "Who's there? You should know that Reiji was lying and I am **not** giving out free kisses." He soon spotted what seemed to be two strange figures approaching through the trees. Fortunately they were calmly walking and not joyously prancing, which ruled out the possibility that the intruders could be fangirls or Reiji Kotobuki. Kurosaki would have been booking it in the opposite direction if that were the case, but instead he held his ground, deciding to protect his spot.

"Well I'm not paying." Muttered the smaller figure of the two, face hidden under his cloak. His partner standing next to him looked like he had been struck by lightning, with black spiky hair sticking out in every direction and a crazed determination in his eyes to match it.

"Well I wouldn't give you one even if you did pay for it, so get lost, I'm working here." Kurosaki grumbled, gripping his bass tighter to himself.

"No, we're working and you're interfering! I bet that you're hiding the white haired freak from us, and I won't tolerate that insult to my boss!" Levi shouted, brandishing a… parabola? Sparks started to generate from the end as Kurosaki started to get up and reevaluate his decision to stay when the world suddenly started to distort around him into an abandoned warehouse. The green grass beneath his feet faded into a dull packed-dirt floor, as the trees began to merge together and morph, fading from warm, textured bark into a cold, gray concrete. The bright sunlight faded away, taking its warmth with it and leaving behind chilly shadows. Little did he know that this sudden change in scenery was all the doing of a certain cloaked mist user.

Looking around the idol found himself alone in the building with a man who looked eerily similar to himself. This man had white hair instead of Kurosaki's grey and violet eyes instead of heterochromatic, but could have otherwise been his twin. The purple mark under his left eye helped to accentuate the difference. However, Kurosaki could care less about his bizzare look-alike when he made the discovery that his precious bass had seemed to have been left behind when he appeared in this building.

"Hey Kurosaki, want a marshmallow?" The new person smiled in an almost sinister fashion, offering the bag to the idol.

"Where's my guitar?" Kurosaki growled, having little patience for the strangely whimsical man.

"Awwww you're no fun." Byakuran pouted as he popped another one into his mouth.

"Well I'm going to be a lot less fun if you don't give my property back real soon."

"What do you need a guitar for, you know that Quartet Night is over now that STARISH has made its debut."

"Oh, really? You think we would go down that easily?"

At that Kurosaki snapped. Not only was his baby gone, but his family had been insulted. There was no way in Hell that he was going to let that one pass. He started to sing, fueling his anger into his music. His passion was almost visible, like flames surrounding his entire person. Byakuran's eyes widened in glee as he pulled out a stick, shoved some marshmallows on the end and started to roast them. However, before his marshmallows could become properly toasted, the warehouse started to crumble away around him and the man, along with his marshmallows, faded away like a ghost. Reality had warped again back to the clearing where Kurosaki found his guitar back in his hands and the two assasins sprawled at his feet in shock. Little did he know that he had now become one of the very few to break through the mist user's illusions. Kurosaki simply shook of the remaining haze from the illusion and sauntered out of the clearing to find a new spot.

"I'm charging extra for that interrogation Levi." Mammon muttered from his daze as the idol departed to find a new spot before he could be interrupted. The only response he received was a pathetic death glare and a not-so-menacing spark.


End file.
